The last quick trip home

Goodbye (again), Athens; Hello, Theodore Gray

As golf enthusiasts and athletes flocked to Augusta for the 2024 Masters Tournament, I fled for the foothills of Ohio, in what will likely be my last trip to Athens for a very long time. Augusta University was closed for its Spring Break, so I took a full week rather than my typical long weekend. This is a not-so-quick overview of that trip.

“I want you to try and remember what it was like to have been very young. And particularly the days when you were first in love; when you were like a person sleepwalking, and you didn’t quite see the street you were in, and didn’t quite hear everything that was said to you. You’re just a little bit crazy. Will you remember that, please?”
― Thornton Wilder, Our Town

MONDAY

Having packed my car in excitement the night before, I hit the road bright and early at 6:30 a.m., and Lemon and I arrived at our hotel around 2:30 p.m. — right at the peak of the solar eclipse. (Call me a romantic or maybe just an avid reader, but there is something poetic about arriving in town at the height of a natural astral phenomenon. At least it felt that way to me.)

Once I checked into my (very drab) Days Inn Hotel room (which is an entire story in itself) and checked out the eclipse, I was itching to get my butt uptown and my arms around some friends. Unfortunately, Athens on a Monday is dead, and I was having a hard time finding one.

After walking up and down Court Street and around Union I stopped in a Ginger for a fried sweet potato sushi roll, which is about the only thing I can get there that is still good. I sat by the window and people watched while I ate, which I have also missed since I’ve been away. It’s a fact that the people in Athens are 100 percent cooler than the people in Augusta, and I’d missed just being around them, even as a fly on the wall.

I was still out of ideas upon finishing my sushi, so I walked through the Ohio University campus and found a secluded spot in the amphitheater in front of Scripps Hall, where I spent countless hours reading and running the ViDS Lab while working on my doctoral degree. It was a little chilly compared to the Georgia weather I’ve become accustomed to, but I pulled my sweater close around me and dove into Henry Miller’s Under the Roofs of Paris, completely impervious to its very welcomed and long-sought foreshadowing.

As I was making my way back to my car to admit defeat and head back to my hotel, I saw that the Jackie O’s Brew Pub had opened up and Arvin was inside tending bar. It was the first friendly face I’d seen since getting into town, so I sat down and caught up. The bar was pretty dead, which gave us plenty of time to chat in a relaxed fashion, which was much needed after my 8-hour drive from Georgia.

While hanging with Arvin throughout his shift I ran into a couple of old friends — in the form of Hayes and his doggo Kira — and made a few new ones as well, which is always fun and appreciated. [To quote the great Chi-Chi Rodriguez in To Wong Foo: Thanks for Everything, Julie Newmar (and NOT my mother), “Get with the program mijas, no one is so rich as to throw away a friend.”] Whenever I come back into town, Jackie O’s always feels like home base. I go there seeking friendship, and I’m seldom disappointed. I certainly wasn’t this night. Or the next morning.

TUESDAY

On Tuesday morning I woke up famished, which hardly ever happens. Unfortunately, Casa was closed, which happens all the time. (They closed for two days so employees could enjoy the partial eclipse.) I ended up settling on eggies and hash browns at Union Street Diner. Absolutely zero complaints, aside from the fact that I had to enjoy breakfast alone because all of my buddies were still snoozin’. Great food, great service, and it really hit the spot. I grabbed some coffee at Court Street immediately after, before heading back to nap and otherwise kill some time back at my hotel.

Dinner that night was even better, because I got to spend it with my good friend Kyle in Columbus. The past few times I have been to the area I’ve stood him up, so I happily drove the extra hour to meet his cat, Lucy, and eat his amazing vegan food, which he cooked himself. It was some sort of quinoa, chickpea, curried cauliflower, kale and tahini bowl-type deal, but it was honestly the best food I had all week. Definitely a step up from the countless Dominos orders we put in back in the day. And it was great to laugh and catch up. How very adult of us.

Kyle literally had to go on a run, so I swung back to Athens in time to catch the very tail ends of Tim Buck Tuesdays and Union Trivia — two events that I definitely did not want to miss! I made it just in time to join the Jackie O’s team for the poetry round, which we did pretty well during. We did not place overall, but I do think we got some sort of top prize for that segment.

After trivia, Megan, Yontz, and I headed over to the Brew Pub while Tim strummed his final tunes of the night. I’d missed hanging out after hours with the crew, especially with my closest friends. I’ve been watching Tim Buck Tuesdays from afar via socials for a couple of years now, so it was exciting to finally check it out live, even if I got there a bit late. And I love every second that I get to spend with Yontz and Megan.

WEDNESDAY

By Wednesday Casa was finally open, so I met up with Megan for an Eggs Peabody, cajun home fries, and tofu bacon. I convinced myself to go full a la carte on the off chance that I never have the opportunity to have it again. We were sat on the stage, the iced coffee was actually good, and the food — as always — was absolutely amazing. Unfortunately, this would be my only opportunity to grab their food while I was in town. I meant to come back for dinner, but time (as it always does) got away from me.

Megan and I grabbed Donkey after brunch, and after killing some time back at my hotel I met up with Yontz for a drink at the Brew Pub, before heading over to The Union for pool league. Yontz competes each week, and I proudly cheered him on from my seat at the bar. While there I ran into a few pals from my days in the JO’s kitchen and on the Tony’s/JO’s dart league. It was a comfort to see friendly faces again, and I was excited to share my big career news with old friends.

Tripp met up with us toward the tail end, and we three went out to eat at Jackie O’s immediately following. I haven’t had the food since the new head chef completely changed up the menu, and it was alright. My harvest salad was incredible, but the kids mac and cheese I got to eat back in my hotel was a big womp WOMP. Just an unflavored mess. So, in a way, I guess you could say I broke even. Apart from the company, which was stellar. ❤️

I finished the evening in the Brew Pub, which is often the trend when I am in Athens. One of my biggest goals for this week back was to feel like I did before I left. That’s an impossible feat to actually accomplish, as the cliche “you can’t go home again” exists for these reasons. But nights like this got me a big closer to that feeling.

THURSDAY

And now we get to the absolute highlight of my trip — meeting my chosen nephew, Theodore Gray!! He is the sole reason I made this trek from Georgia to Ohio, and his smile was worth every mile.

Lemon is far too rotten to meet a baby, so she stayed with her Auntie Megan and drove Doja and all the other house doggos absolutely nuts while making herself entirely at home while I was gone. I dropped her off, along with some coffee from Court Street, and hit the road to Oberlin.

After a rainy drive I arrived in town around 3:30 p.m. and when I say that I do not have words for how instantaneously, deeply, and devoutly I loved that baby.

Where do I even begin? I have never met a happier baby, and Theo has every right to be. Four months in and Sierra and Becca are already killing it as parents, and I saw first hand just how much work it takes. Together they’re raising a child who is wide-eyed, joyous, inquisitive. I don’t believe Theodore cried one time the entire time I was visiting, but I definitely did. Now that I’ve finally met him, it’s going to be so much harder to go long periods of time without seeing that little face in person.

Thursday afternoon and evening was all about family. I’ve spent the past four months watching baby Theodore move through his daily routines in shared family photo albums, but I was so grateful to finally hold him in my arms and kiss the top of his little baby head (and the bottom of his little baby feets). It had been a long time since I’d held a baby, but holding him felt natural because my heart was so full.

While visiting with Theodore we got to read a lot of books, play in some water, work on tummy time, and take a couple of stroller nappies. I was able to experience a few giggles, lots of smiles, and some big farts for a (not-so) little babe! (It was kind of impressive.) And while I was bathing my perfect chosen-nephew in adoration, I got to catch up with my very best friends.

We’ve come so far in the nine years that we’ve known each other. I’d ask, “Who would have thought,” but I think I knew we’d ultimately get here. At least I had always hoped. I’m so proud of Sierra and Becca and the little family they’ve built. I can’t wait to build even more memories with Theodore, who was so wanted, so precious, and so deserved. Outside of my own, I can’t think of better moms. And Theodore is certainly the best baby ever born.

And all because of that dog with the mountain of money under its butt.

For dinner we ordered ThiNi Thai, which was both authentic and incredibly delicious. All of Augusta’s international cuisine is trash, so it’s hard to define how good this food was, especially after so long of being without. I had the Thai veggie stir fry with tofu and spring rolls and I practically licked my plate.

After Theodore was in bed for his first sleep of the night, Becca threw some chocolate chip cookies in the oven and the three of us played this awful game I brought called Confident?, which required that players “answer quirky questions with a range.” I’d seen something like it on a podcast I watch, but it did not turn out to be the rip-rolling laugh-fest that I expected. But the cookies were delicious and we had fun anyway, because we were all together! After looking through some photos of Theodore, who was peacefully sleeping on the baby cam, we all headed to bed in preparation of another early morning.

FRIDAY

I didn’t want to miss a moment with baby Theodore, so Sierra tapped on my door when he woke up for the day, which wasn’t until about 7 or 7:30 a.m. (I’m telling you, he’s SUCH a good baby in every single possible way.) Each morning Becca dances Theodore around the house as part of “Bebe and the Good Morning Brigade,” and this morning I got to be a part!

After coffee and morning salutations, Sierra, Becca, and I ordered breakfast from a local diner and enjoyed some eggies, breakfast potatoes, and toast (with a side of our own vegan sausage). It was your typical diner fair, but every meal I share with my best friends/chosen family is a special to me. Especially now that there is another member of the family to share in these memories with us. Bonds are often strengthened around the dinner table, and I’m glad that we had a chance to break bread as four, rather than three. (Theodore’s a baby and can’t eat bread, just boobs, but you know what I’m getting at.)

After breakfast came goodbyes or, rather, indefinite “see ya laters.” It would have been easier to rip my heart out and leave it on the floor, because while I know I will see them again, I don’t know when. The not knowing is often the hardest part, at least it’s going to be for me. I cried for a large part of the drive home, but I remain so very grateful that I got to meet Theodore and hold tight to my best friends before I set off toward California.

And of course, there was this misbehavin’ miscreant waiting for me when I got back to Athens, which made the drive back a bit easier.

Lemon and I decided to switch hotels for our final two days in Athens because the first was such a dive. I ended up sneaking her into the Quality Inn. She wasn’t allowed to be there, but luckily for us (and my wallet) the hotel was none-the-wiser. For all her rotten ways, she actually is quite quiet, 98 percent of the time. Leaving the fan and television on whenever I left the room certainly helped.

As soon as I got checked into my new spot (which was MUCH more comfortable than the last), I had to bounce back out to get ready for Maddie’s birthday party. (Yontz’s girlfriend was celebrating her birthday at Purple Chopsticks and very graciously invited me to attend!) Once I got uptown I picked up a card, a Donkey gift certificate, and a tiny jade cat, since she’s also a cat mom. I quickly pulled everything together at the Brew Pub and then headed to the restaurant, where Megan and Erin were already setting up balloons and getting everything set for the party.

Dinner was delicious, and I am so grateful that I was able to celebrate the occasion with everyone at the table, which included Maddie, Yontz, Megan, Arvin, Erin, Kirby, and one or two others that I know I am forgetting. I had a Jamaican Thai tofu stir fry dish with a tomato soup starter, but the artichoke parmesan dip was probably the highlight for me. I’d never been to Purple Chopstix, and it makes me sad that I will likely never be back. If I ever am, I would really love to try out their tofu crepes.

Most importantly, Maddie seemed to have a happy birthday surrounded by friends and great food. (I also think she liked the gifts I got her, so that is also a win.)

But Maddie wasn’t the only one in town celebrating a birthday that night — as Steve was in Athens as well! We met up at the Brew Pub right around the time J-Row was getting off of work for the evening, which was just perfect. All my best guys, together in one place again! Adami was also working, so for a moment it felt like very little had changed in the three years since I left.

J-Row, Adami and I ended up hanging out until the wee hours of the night/early morning, which I haven’t done since I left Athens. It was so refreshing to be around friends again that it was hard to pull myself away from them, despite the time.

However, as much fun as it was to hang with the old JO’s gang, I would be remiss if I did not mention the real news of the night — which was this nonsense. (Photo borrowed from Yontz’s Instagram stories.)

A drunk driver drove on top of another car outside of The Union, trapping a doggo inside the orange car and the driver inside the red one. For, like, hours. A crowd of people, myself included, stood outside for what felt like a full hour or two, gawking as police tried to figure out how to rectify the situation. From what I have heard, the driver has been charged with an OVI, but everyone is otherwise okay.

SATURDAY

After such an eventful week, Saturday was extremely chill. Which is great, because I needed it to be.

It wasn’t just that I was exhausted from a week of hangs, even though I definitely was. It was at this point that I started to get into my head about the length of time that would likely pass before I made it back to Athens. Augusta is a 7.5 hour drive, but once I move to California I will need to fly back to visit, which will significantly limit long weekends and quick trips. Being completely honest with myself, I do not know when (or if) I will be back. Consequently, I don’t know when (or if) I will see many of the friends that Athens has made family.

This was extremely sad to think about, so after waking up late and swinging by Jackie O’s to say hello (or what would really be goodbye) to some of the gang, I went to J-Row’s house for a hug and a hang. We ended up watching hours of Stavros Halkias stand up while talking nonsense. I’m always looking for new comics and his crowd work is brutally funny. But it was more fun to just sit around and spend an evening doing nothing with a friend. I don’t have those evenings in Augusta, and it will likely be some time before I have them in Long Beach.

As I left J-Row’s house I realized I hadn’t had O’Betty’s once in my trip. I quickly rectified that with a shy Mata Hari and some fries, which I ate back in my hotel room, after a long, boiling hot bath. I think that out of all the uniquely Athens restaurants that I’m going to miss from California, O’Betty’s may top the list. (Casa is a close second, I just can’t stand half the people who work there. They’re also never open, so it’s easier to miss them.)

SUNDAY

The next day brought an “early” start that began two hours later than intended. I left Athens at exactly 8 a.m. and made it home shortly after 4 or 4:30 p.m. without incident. I cried a little. I listened Last Podcast on the Left A LOT. And as much as I hate Augusta and most of the people in it, I certainly missed my boys — Woodward and Bernstein — who have been showering me with love since I walked in the door.

My next big trip will be to California, and I cannot wait to begin taking those steps. In the meantime, here are a few songs that sum up how it felt to be in and say goodbye to Athens — the second time around.